So, I’m on the train home after yet another date. I think I might just start documenting my dating here for a while.. “Bare with me I’m currently deep in my thoughts as I write this”
He kissed me and jumped on the escalator!!!!!
I’m jumping ahead but bare with me my minds all over the place. Now i never usually get anxious when going on a date, I mean after all I go on dates all the time. But this time was different. My chest got tight and my heart felt achy. I mean wtf is that about? Did my blood pressure spike!?
Now this guy is handsome, really really realllly handsome. Usually when I go on dates I make little to no real heartfelt effort. I’ll put basic makeup on and pick a casual outfit. Never dresses or heels… pretty much flats and a jumper. I avoid showing my figure too. Now for today I remained consistent in my little effort routine In regards to my clothing BUT…. I washed my hair, I double winged my eyeliner with a slither of gold and I used baking powder on my face. (That’s a big deal for me)
I wanted him to like me, I wanted to answer all his questions correctly. I wanted to pass the test…..
I’m sitting here wondering why is this date any different to the others?…. Truth is, I think it’s because I Am Ready for love.
I never usually pray before a date but today I prayed, not for him to like me, not for him to be the one, I prayed for myself. I prayed God would open my eyes and my heart to see who is right for me and to love unconditionally. What’s funny is a year ago, I prayed and asked God to hide me, I prayed that he would cover me with a veil from those who are not for me. I prayed that those who weren’t for me would not see me nor understand me. (Not the real me, not my character and not my soul)
“Funny thing is for the past few dates I’ve been told I am a Mystery, a mysterious woman and a challenge to get to know”
What’s also funny is I’m open and honest, I guess they just couldn’t see me…..
Today, there has been a beautiful shift in my heart, there’s been hope, hope that I in fact am lovable and worthy for the right man. Hope, that there is someone who can find pleasure and joy in my presence. Hope that I can and will make the right person happy.
We went to a little English pub, which was busy and not ideal. As we walked along the streets of London chatting and flirting, my eyes set upon upon this contemporary furniture store (we named it the posh Ikea!)– We went inside and there situated right at the back of the store was a cafe. We grabbed a hot drink and sat on the sofa effortlessly talking about everything. Making each moment memorable.
He had to rush back to work and on the walk back to the station he cuddled me, looked down at me smitten. He held my hand, remained affectionate throughout. Told me I’m stunning and every so often I caught a glimpse of him watching me and smiling. Is this what’s been missing with every other date? I have a rule on a first date. No touching (except a greeting hug and leaving kiss on the cheek) and NO KISSING.
If I kissed every guy I met on a date I’d be the definition of a kissing whore!
As we walk to the underground I can sense he’s waiting for the right moment to kiss me. I feel it coming but I’m unsure when… I’m also unsure whether I’m going to kiss back, whether he’ll pick a romantic moment……
We approached the barriers and did our goodbyes.. we gave each other a cuddle and as I went to step back he plastered a kiss on my lips so quick I couldn’t move. I was in shock. I knew it was coming, I just didn’t expect it to happen so… I had this stunned look on my face, almost frozen 😳
Then out of nowhere he’s on the escalator…
He kissed and RAN!!! 🤣😂
What a funny guy?!?
I’m not going to talk about whether he’s the one or not…. truth is…. I have no idea. I’m done with searching. I appreciate the encounters I’ve made and the lessons I’ve learnt.
Right now- All I know Is I had a great time and my heart is READY FOR LOVE 💖