Being a working mum is hard work! Being a parent alone with little people to care for is a task within itself, then add on a full on job with targets, deadlines and a bunch of people relying on you and it can honestly feel like you have the world on your shoulders.
Infact in my opinion. It is having the world on your shoulders, all this expectation to be perfect, to be a fantasic and loving parent and that amazing employee…. it’s a hard life, and some parents, myself included; I too can struggle to find a balance….
There were occasions especially in dentistry where I had almost quit, I almost walked out and said “Screw you world!” There’s no denying I use to let work get to me, in my previous role I got stressed and overwhelmed. I was sleep deprived and exhausted . Perfect combination for destruction.
So what stopped me from quitting and speaking in an unflattering and unacceptable manor to some of my colleagues due to stress?
I challenged myself! I challenged myself not to give up. Not because of the money or the kids, but for me…..For my sanity…. Losing my temper and quitting would have been my biggest regret and something I know deep down would keep me up at night pondering. I had my ultimate goal which is to one day live comfortably with my family.
“You can’t win if you quit”
Bishop TD Jakes
Working mums are the strongest people I know. Not only are they brave and courageous but best believe they will be up with no sleep from Friday to Sunday with their sick baby and still manage to get into work Monday morning and hit their targets whilst sitting through their lunch break having the most pointless meeting only to leave work during rush hour to collect their kid to start a whole other Job!
Working mums are grinders and unfortunately we don’t all live in an understanding world. I spoke with a friend who is a working mum to 2 under 5’s and she said “Your manger will ask you how things are at home….So your honest. You tell him you’ve had no sleep or your kids are running riot…. he nods, says he understands as his little one was the same then gives you the biggest work load ever and really doesn’t care whist your other colleagues jet off home early or work from home”. She felt that she couldnt complain because she needed the job not just for the financial reasons but because of the adult interaction, the change to her day.
I personally agree with her on this one….We love our kids but for some, having a job is a much needed break from parenting.
Some days at work are good, fun, entertaining and some days are bad, exhausting and demotivating. I guess all I can say is don’t give up. Someone once said to me, they struggled soo much when their kids where young, just to work and put food on the table but now her daughters are in their late 20’s and married. Now she’s living! She has an amazing job, an amazing salary, an amazing lifestyle because she never gave up. She built her career whilst being a mother! So yes, Working mums it might seem like a struggle “right now” but this moment will not last forever…All this hard work you are putting in, you will reap the rewards one day.
One day your going to be a mother to adults watching your children graduate University/College and your hard work and efforts will be a big part of their inspiration. One day you will be a doting grandmother lucky enough to take early retirement because you put in all the work when you were younger and they were younger so you now have a substantial pension. Your mortgage will be paid! You can travel! You can live life to the fullest!
“It might not be your time right now, but your time WILL come”
I’m not saying that, you should risk your health and your much needed quality time with your kids to work and if you feel you are getting stressed, overwhelmed and exhausted I urge you to speak to a healthcare professional about your struggles but if this past week was your bad week just have a think about what your goal is and how can it be achieved without you feeling like you need to quit working if deep down you don’t want to. Explore ways to make life more manageable and seek additional support from your loved ones. Take some much needed holiday but maybe dedicate a couple days to leaving your baby in childcare just so you can have some “me time”. Or, use some of your holiday to spend more time with the kids, if you feel your job is taking precious time away from them.
Today is the day I want you to think about your life and how you can make your lifestyle work better for you and your family. What do YOU need?
Just remember….We are living in the present…..the future is yet to be lived…
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Lots of love
Photo disclaimer: I do not own rights to this photo and obtained it from pixabay.com.