Now seriously guys! “Motherhood” has hit the Next Bloody Level!
Yes! You read that correctly! I literally slept in shit! and to make matters worse it wasn’t even my own sh*t. I was gifted with a shitty pillow by ONE of the Rosebuds kids!
Now I suppose your wondering how this happened right? Well basically at some point while I was out last night (having dinner with friends) someone did a poo… Now my children like to poo and say nothing until you smell it or it’s a visible accident so Im assuming it went something like this…..
- Belly grumbling…
- Bit of a strain..
- Warm, stinking, nappy..
- Idea::”let’s jump and slide on Mummys bed👍”
- Oops there’s poop on my thigh! yuk!💩
- “Daddy, Daddy! I poo poo!…”
Then muggings here gets in at 3am after an epic night and I’m exhausted. Plump up the bloody shitty pillow and lay my head to sleep. None the wiser!
Now it’s already done and dusted and I’m sure it was an accident (I hope….) but the worst thing is I can’t actually be 100% sure who did it! There’s a 50/50 chance out of the 2 boys as they both still require support cleaning their bottoms. But I’m sorry; within 9 years of motherhood I have NEVER slept, in or on top of sh*t until last night. This is truly a new and gross experience that I’m guessing shows motherhood in true fashion!
“Long gone are the days of sh*t smeared walls and toilet bowls….. I mean, clearly one of my kids is a mastermind, thinks he’s Picasso and has upgraded his skills to sh*t smearing on my flipping pillow!!!!”
I know I joke about this, but what else can I do aye? Kids are honestly full of surprises!. Anyway, Im off to go wash my face…..hair, infact I might go swim in some disinfectant……
Tell me!…..What are some of the most outrageous things your kids have done? Please, humor me a little so I don’t feel I’m the only one to endure this foolishness!
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